You’re in love and everything is rainbows and butterflies!
In this beginning stage of every relationship, it is too easy to overlook the red flags that are warning you of things to come.
When you see things that are concerning, you may find yourself explaining them away.
“They’re just being protective!”
“Isn’t that cute. They are jealous!”
“They just want me to be the best version of myself!”
Little by little, these little red flags will turn into a big, nasty part of your relationship.
The honeymoon phase will end, and you will realize that you have been investing in a doomed relationship with a toxic person.
Of course, no relationship is perfect! We all have our disagreements and we need to learn how to talk them through.
However, there are some serious red flags that are almost always indicators of major problems to come!
Below are 9 red flags to be aware of in a new relationship.
1.) Major Jealousy Issues
In every successful relationship, there is a healthy amount of jealousy.
This comes in the form of wanting a certain level of commitment from your partner.
They should not be showing signs of being interested in other people or trying to gain attention from other people.
However, this jealousy can easily go way overboard – leaving you feeling smothered by your partner’s toxic jealousy!
“Why did you give him/her a hug goodbye?”
“Why are you texting him/her? You know I don’t like them.”
“You never wear your hair the way I told you I liked it. Are you doing it for him?”
Their jealousy will start seeping into every conversation and interaction.
They will make you feel insecure – like the problem is with you instead of them.
Confront this behavior as soon as you see it! If nothing changes, you need to run out of that relationship!
Never let anyone stomp on you and your freedom!
2.) Disrespect to those around them
“But they aren’t rude or disrespectful to me!”
Oh, your day is coming!
When your partner is rude and disrespectful to those around them, this behavior will certainly spill over into your relationship!
This comes in the form of being rude to your server in a restaurant. Or getting unnecessarily angry at a customer service rep on the phone.
This is called the “bully mentality”. It makes them feel superior or powerful when they pick on someone who is in a difficult position to defend themselves.
This behavior is pathetic and it needs to be confronted immediately because sooner than later, you will become the target of such behavior.
3.) Exaggeration of Everything
Exaggeration is lying!
This bad habit is often the first sign that someone is not trustworthy.
Their stories are always embellished and their sense of reality is completely untrustworthy.
Eventually, they will start exaggerating facts in your relationship.
If you get in a disagreement, they may spread a rumor that you screamed at them in a fit of rage – when in reality you didn’t even come close.
Have you caught your significant other telling a lie or twisting the truth for their own benefit? Even worse, do they make you feel bad if you confront them?
If you see “constantly twisting the truth” as a pattern of behavior, you may need to walk away.
If you stay with them, you will get pulled into their web of lies and become a victim of your own making.
Related Articles: 10 Signs Your Relationship Has Serious Communication Problems
4.) Workaholic Syndrome
Does your partner love their job?
In one sense, that can can be good – showing dedication and job stability.
However, when their career commitment takes precedence in your relationship, it can turn into a big problem!
Are they on their phone all the time on dates?
Do they cancel on you because of work-related responsibilities?
Do they invite you over, only to have them focused on work the whole time?
As your partner focuses on their career goals, they may start to forget that you are a major part of the dream! But maybe they just assume that you will always be there.
If they spend more time on their phone or laptop than they do focusing on you, this is a major red flag!
It is an absolute necessity for them to learn how to find a good work/life balance. Otherwise, they may wake up on day and realize that they have no-one to share their success with.
It is wonderful that they are dedicated to their work. But you must have a conversation about finding a work/life balance that is healthy for your relationship.
If they are not able to find some time to commit to you and your relationship, you may need to move on.
In stark contrast to the point above, perhaps your partner is lazy!
Do they lack goals and ambition?
Or do they always talk about the great things they want to accomplish, but they never take the steps to even start it?
Do they give up on everything they try?
If you are a hard worker with a lot of ambition, you need to be careful because you could end up being someone’s meal ticket!
Your significant other may admire your work ethic for the sole purpose of knowing that you will support them and their lazy butt!
Note: This is NOT referring to couples who agree for one of them to stay home, while the other financially supports the family. This is a decision you have to make as a couple. This article is referring to lazy individuals who have no goals or passions of any substance.
If you have amazing goals, but you are with someone who’s plan is to float through life with no purpose, you should probably lose them!
Otherwise, you will be choosing a life’s partner who will hold you back, not encourage you properly, not share any of the same goals, and selfishly pick apart your dreams. In the end, you will have nothing in common.
Related Articles: 7 Things Confident Women Do Differently In Relationships
6.) Commitment Issues
Are they showing signs that they aren’t 100% committed to your relationship?
Perhaps they suddenly just want to ‘keep things casual’.
Or maybe they just don’t like showing your relationship on social media.
Maybe they love to flirt with other people – reassuring you that it doesn’t mean anything. (That is a lie, by the way)
To the world, they want to look and act completely single and available – while enjoying the benefits of a committed romantic partner.
Don’t let someone use you like that!
And don’t let anyone convince you that you’re being too sensitive or insecure.
You know what is best for you – and you deserve to be in a relationship with a person that you can trust with your future!
Is it all about them?
In the beginning, you felt absolutely loved and adored!
They showed you with attention, gifts, and adoration.
But maybe that has dwindled. Or perhaps you are starting to notice that they are obsessed with themselves and what they want.
Your opinion or desires don’t really matter because it doesn’t align with what they want.
You will see these selfishness tendencies in everything that they do.
It will show up with how they treat their space, time, money, etc.
No amount of gifts or compliments will ever make up for the unconditional love that you will never receive in your relationship.
Selfishness will ruin you, one way or another.
8.) Constantly pushing boundary limits
In the beginning of every relationship, most people talk about healthy boundaries and their expectations.
Everyone is different – but boundaries usually exist!
Does your partner constantly push your boundaries – knowing that isn’t what you want.
Perhaps you made it clear that you didn’t want to do something – physically. But they keep going there and trying push things farther.
This is a huge red flag that they don’t have your best interest at heart and that they aren’t trustworthy!
Simply put, they are thinking of themselves and being completely selfish!
No amount of coercing, teasing, joking, or pressuring should make you push your boundaries beyond what you know is good for you.
Don’t let them manipulate you into going farther than you know is right – in every area of your relationship.
9.) That ‘Gut Feeling’ Never Goes Away
In the end, no one knows better than you.
You may be head over heels in love, but you still have this weird feeling in the pit of your stomach. Something just doesn’t feel right.
Once you start getting suspicious, it won’t take too long for you to start seeing more signs. And don’t let your significant other convince you that you are overthinking it.
Maybe their story doesn’t quite line up, they are acting slightly different, or you simply notice a difference in the atmosphere of the relationship.
That good old ‘gut feeling’ has saved many people from damaging relationships. Listen to your gut!
Eventually, you are going to have to confront them – with some proof that your “gut feelings” were 100% correct.
- 7 Signs You’re Not With Your Soulmate
- 9 Signs Of Cheating That Are Easy To Miss
- 7 Things Confident Women Do Differently In Relationships
If you are reading this article, there is a pretty good chance that you are seeing red flags!
If this is true, you shouldn’t feel guilty when you realize that it is time to move on.
You must communicate your concerns with them, and if they are unwilling to change, you may need to walk away.
Life is too short to stay with someone who makes you feel unhappy and unsatisfied.